Source | Business Standard : By Áine Cain
Navigating any sort of office romance can be tricky.
You’d better figure out whether the other party is just a work spouse – or something more. You’ve got to make sure you say all the right things. And, perhaps most importantly, you need to be prepared to have things blow up in your face.
However, what if the romance in question involves someone having a crush on you? And what happens if that someone is your boss?
Needless to say, things can get complicated. First and foremost, it’s important to determine whether your boss really has a crush on you.
Here are 17 red flags:
1. You have a gut feeling
Most people will give their managers the benefit of the doubt at first, but sometimes there’s an inner voice telling you that something between you two feels awkward, says Lynn Taylor, a national-workplace expert and leadership coach and the author of “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant.”
She says: “Gut instincts aren’t whims. They’re your subconscious on steroids. It’s putting hundreds of facts together, with the ultimate result being an emotion or physical feeling – in this case, of discomfort or irritation. If you’re unhappy or angry about the situation, you’re right.”
2. They flirt
“Carefully observe how the boss treats other colleagues before leaping to any conclusions,” says Michael Kerr, an international business speaker and author of “The Humor Advantage.” “They may be a very effusive, gregarious person who simply behaves that way with everyone because they’re a people pleaser. And even if your boss flirts with you from time to time, again, consider how they are with other colleagues – they may be a naturally flirtatious person who really means no harm.”
And also consider your own actions. Are they flirting with you simply because you’ve been a little flirtatious with them? Be very cautious when interpreting someone else’s intentions behind their actions.
And if you determine that you’re the only one they flirt with, and it’s not a result of your behavior toward them, then this is a strong sign they’re crushing on you.
3. They regularly schedule private or late-night meetings
If you’re occasionally asked to stay beyond normal business hours and have a legitimate joint project to work on, that’s one thing, says Taylor.
“But if you start seeing a pattern of being singled out, and the meetings are always running late – or there are too many unnecessary private meetings – then your boss may be trying to go beyond a professional scope,” she says.
Keep in mind that if you’re uncomfortable with these actions and you continue to comply with these requests, things will get worse.